Kingdom of Aeristine

Fuzzy Times at Axe High

A Burning Question at Hatchetmen HQ

Deacon’s log, astrological date 12.15.13

After the celebration and the ceremony with the Duke, we had a little time to relax and enjoy our new fame as the dragonslaying saviors of Burke. In fact, people started calling us The 4 Dragons and so we changed our name to that (we were formerly the Basilisk Mercenary Co.)

In the ensuing days I oversaw the beginnings of the construction of Ronan’s new megachurch in the slum district. Some beggars were miffed at the razing of a few dilapidated crack-houses and brothels, and the local Thieves’ Guild was suspicious that religious donations would be cutting into their take, but so far things were going fairly smoothly for a project of this magnitude. Blake was spending his days happily researching new magical theories while Raynard studies law. Kalli wondered if she could be Polymorphed into an elf without any side effects. Stefan conducted training with the city guard. Hrolf did whatever heretical priests do. We all began moving into our new digs… an island stronghold in the river delta.

One day, we were all (luckily) over at the new place, arranging furniture and so forth, when we saw a mushroom cloud erupt in our old neighborhood. It was our old house! Some nefarious goon had Fireballed it, singeing our poor dwarfservant Duggan, and ruining some of our stuff. This aggression could not stand. We assumed it was the work of our new nemeses: The Hatchetmen. We immediately headed off to their warehouse headquarters, lusting for vengeance. They tried to burn us down? We would burn them down. (The vengeance of Ronan is swift and severe.)

Approaching the warehouse, we knocked on the front door. No answer. So the others fanned out around the building, as Kalli and Blake and I remained at the front to rig up an exploding barrel. We detonated it, and the front door caught fire. Using the powers of Ronan, I ensorcelled the fire to produce a thick, choking black smoke that exclusively wafted inwards, filling the warehouse with noxious fumes in minutes.

Shortly, a window opened up above along the side of the building, to vent smoke. Blake chuckled at their predictability, and immediately lobbed a fireball through the opening! KA-BOOM! Meanwhile, Hrolf around back began to use his dwarf-god’s favors to alter the shape of the stones forming the back doorway, so that he and Stefan could slip in that way. Hrolf and I both asked our respective gods for their blessings on this mission of righteous vengeance. As Stefan clanked his way in, a flurry of hatchets flew at him from all directions, tinking off his armor.

On the other side of the building, Kalli scampered up the wall towards the second floor window. Below her, Blake and I opened a large delivery door, to see several hatchets flying out at us. I ducked behind The Decanter and the hatchets stopped in midair and fell to the ground, halted by his Protection from Normal Missiles. Nice!

At this point Kalli spider-clung to the wall next to the window, detected a guard behind it, and just stabbed him in the face right through the window. Then she spun around and stabbed through the adjacent window as well, and finally dove through the broken glass to enter the building. Landing on a catwalk, she leapt up and began just violently shanking her way through several Hatchetmen who had been stationed up above, one-by-one. We could see many brown-robed Hatchetmen fleeing at the sight of this spectacle, but many wearing red robes remained, as well as a couple green and yellow. Did the colors represent some rank or status? We didn’t know yet.

Below, Blake and I strode forward into the threshold. The bard looked up, sang a few magic notes, and caused a Wall of Fire to spring up all along a catwalk that ran perpendicular to the one Kalli was on, igniting the robes of another line of Hatchtmen who were advancing along it towards her. A couple of them leapt off screaming, to a 15’ drop where they broke their legs. We could see that the original fire had spread from the front door explosion, so now there were two sources of fire.

Hrolf then barreled in behind Stafan, bowling over a large Hatchetman thug. Stefan buried an axe in another one’s head, laughing at the dwarf’s tactics, and slaughtering foes with a song in his heart despite a couple of strong blows he received himself.

Suddenly a large cask of liquor to the right of Blake and I exploded! The rest of the catwalk guards started to climb down as fast as possible. I Produced a handful of brilliant holy Flame and tossed it at a pile of wooden crates they were using as a staircase, and it slowly ignited them too. Next I asked a great boon of Ronan – that he would grant Blake and myself immunity to fire, so that we might enter the rapidly growing conflagration and move about safely. We took a deep a breath, a leap of faith, and entered into the flames consuming the warehouse! Like horsemen of the apocalypse come to deal death, we strode almost in slow motion.

Blake brandished a lighting wand and began loosing bolts of sizzling energy at anything that moved, as I stalked along side him, smashing down any assailant who dared come too close with my flail.

A salvo of whistling magic missiles issued forth from a doorway across the room (some kind of office) and swooped upward into the center of the room, striking Raynard full the face! He had been lurking above, peering down through the sky light to snipe with bow an arrow, but a magic user must have detected him.

Across the building, Hrolf and Stefan now were backed up against one another, surrounded by a press of foes. Hrolf began to pray furiously for deliverance, as Stefan held them off.

Kalli, covered in blood, somehow hopped over the side of the catwalk, and began running literally sideways down the side of it, clinging horizontally like a spider. She paused to slice open another Hatchetman, then sprinted straight down a wall of crates the the floor.

Suddenly a devastatingly freezing Ice Blast whirled up around Blake and I, catching us unaware and tearing shards of ice into our unprotected backs. That accursed magic user! I took the brunt of it and collapsed in shock, but The Decanter soldiered on. I felt my spirit rising up out of my body, and miraculously I could still observe the battle! I saw a Hatchetman captain in the office room dart through an interdimensional door and escape. I saw Kalli and Stefan cutting down several more thugs. I saw a mysterious energy coalescing on the upper balcony, and so did Blake, who directed a lightning bolt up there – this caused a humanoid shape to appear, collapsing and spasming on the catwalk. An invisible wizard! Several more Hatchetmen fled, and from there it was just cleaning up, nothing too remarkable. Eventually I felt a tug back into my body, as Hrolf prayed over my prone form, and my comrades must have carried me away and taken me back home to recover. More next time, everything’s a little bit fuzzy right now.

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